It’s only natural for tension to build as the exams draw closer and it can be a stressful time for everyone at home
Mood swings, erratic behaviour, panic attacks, extreme worry, tears – every young person will deal with the pressure around exams differently.
However, students aren’t the only ones who need support in the run up to exam time, parents do too. After all, how can you help an anxious child when you’re feeling anxious yourself?
If you feel ill-equipped to deal with your child’s reaction to exam stress, it can be easy to feel as if you have failed your child when you see them suffering from anxiety.
In honour of Mental Health Awareness Week (13 – 19 May), here are some things you can do to ease the anxiety for both you and the student in your home:
Eat well
Our gut and brain are connected by the vagus nerve, the immune system and hormonal systems. The more varied our diet is, the better our gut health is. This, in turn, supports brain health. Research from University College Cork shows that people who eat a varied diet rich in prebiotics like artichokes, leeks and onions and probiotics like kefir, sauerkraut and kombucha, have better mental wellbeing than people who eat more ultra processed foods. Omega 3 fatty acids can support with gut and brain health and wellbeing, too. It’s also very important to stay hydrated throughout the day by drinking at least eight glasses of water.
Get fresh air
Getting outdoors, particularly in the morning, is a great mood booster and will set you up for a better day of work and study. If you can go somewhere in nature, away from main roads and traffic, even better. Taking deep breaths while you’re outside will help you feel more grounded and better able to handle any stressful situation you encounter. It will also provide you with some exercise which is vital for maintaining calm and promoting better sleep.
Maintain good sleep hygiene
Sleep is the foundation stone of good mental wellbeing. When we’re sleep deprived, we feel less able to cope. GP and women’s health specialist Dr Doireann O’Leary says that good sleep hygiene measures include going to bed at the same time and waking at the same time everyday, keeping your bedroom dark and well ventilated, avoiding phone use close to bedtime and avoiding caffeine – tea/coffee/coke/diet coke/green tea after midday. Of course, this is easier said than done, especially if you’ve got a teenager who insists on studying late into the night and is making themselves large cups of coffee round the clock. Click here for more reasons why sleep is vital for a healthy brain and body.
Take time for yourself
Life can be overwhelming when there is a lot of stress or tension at home. Mitigate this by taking some time for yourself to do whatever makes you happy – it could be reading a book, spending time with a pet, meditating, playing a video game or listening to a podcast. You need this to decompress and get a bit of space if things get heated. Encourage your child to do the same. If you’re worried that they’re spending too much time studying, join them for 20 minutes to watch a quick episode of their favourite light-hearted TV show to help unwind before bed.
Be extra considerate
Emotions run high during exam time and if something hurtful is said in the heat of an argument, it’s important to take a beat and not retaliate with the first thing that comes into your mind. Take a step back, breathe in and remind yourself that they are going through one of the most stressful event of their young lives. By the same token, you need to be considerate to yourself too. If you say something you regret, apologise immediately, explain that you didn’t mean it but don’t beat yourself up about it. Everyone slips up from time to time.
Talk to someone
If your child has poured out their worries to you, it’s natural to feel concerned about them in turn. But instead of bottling it all up and putting on a brave face, it’s vital to have someone you can talk to about things. Whether that’s a partner, a spouse, a sibling, a therapist or a friend, make sure you take the time to process how you’re doing and talk it out before your problems start to feel insurmountable.